When does farting yourself awake become frowned upon?
Scroll down for a roundup of the hilarious parenting content from the week, guaranteed to make you smile, if not laugh out loud. And the odd helpful tip.
Happy Saturday Dads!
Someone made the observation recently that “no one has more on their to-do list than a toddler at bedtime”, and we’re not sure we’ve ever felt more understood.
If it’s not tipping out all the toys [again!], then it’ll be a longlist of unanswered questions about the universe.
Coming up this week…
Where in the world do babies cry the most?
A guide to baby sleeping schedules
Recipe of the week
Orlando Bloom steps up to the plate
As always, if you enjoyed this week’s edition and think you might know someone else who would, please do share. We know how tough being a parent can be, and sometimes you just need a moment to laugh at some of the craziness.
Thanks for reading, and enjoy that beer when it finally comes.
Fred @
(a fellow dad of 2)
👀 As seen on Insta
You do not need an account to watch the videos; they are just a little light relief to make you smile on a Saturday morning.
Follow us on Instagram to enjoy many more each day.
🔢 It’s all in the numbers
If you think that your newborn cries a lot, then you’re probably right. At least you would be if you were comparing your baby to the average baby in Denmark.
“Official” advice we’re willing to impart: never compare your baby!
It turns out babies in the UK cry more than most, at an average of two hours per day during the first two weeks, with 28% of infants suffering colic versus only 5.5% in Denmark.
However, if you’re now considering a last minute move to Copenhagen, you’ll want to prepare for the commonplace practice of leaving your child unattended outside restaurants whilst you dine.
Wait, that actually sounds great…where do we sign up?
⚒️ Try this
A sleeping child may be the peak of parenting bliss; but it’s not always easy.
To help set expectations and navigate this particular minefield with your baby, we’ve found this helpful infographic.
💻 Dad hack of the week
Anyone who’s gone through the weaning process knows that your kitchen will likely never look the same again.
Here’s a genius hack (if it stays on…) to reduce the amount of congealed puree you’ll find in your kids hair.
Full video here.
🍽️ Recipe of the week
Because sometimes it’s the simple things that truly make the yummiest dishes. Pretty sure we’ll be enforcing the “dad tax” on this one!
Recipe: BANGERS & BEANZ SMILEY PIE
🫘 1x tin of baked beans
🌭 8x sausages
🧀 a load of grated cheese
🥔 12x potato smileys
Instructions:
Fully cook the sausages in the oven before chopping up and mixing with a tin of beans. Top with cheese (optional mixed herbs) & smileys. Then return to the oven.
Full recipe here.
⭐ How the stars do it
Orlando Bloom shows us that whilst we may not be able to breastfeed, there’s always something we can do to feel important.
Full video here.
Upcoming dates that it might be worth having up your sleeve:
Mother’s Day | 10th March; to be honest, with only 15 days to go, now would be the perfect time to start thinking about what you might be able to do.
Here are a few potential routes that are likely to go down well:
Matching outfits: try the well trodden dungaree path with Dotty’s Dungarees or pyjamas with Chelsea Peers
Personalised storybooks: pull on the heartstrings with a present from your little one from Wonderbly
Photobook: head down memory lane with a curated photobook from Photobox
Birthstone jewellery: if you’re feeling flush then a bit of sparkle will always be enjoyed and we’ve been instructed that Monica Vinader never fails
Saving that, a nice meal out and some flowers will show that at least you didn’t forget…this year.
That’s it for this week folks.
Thanks again for reading, as always we leave you with one HILARIOUS joke to share with the family.
My wife asked me to stop singing “Wonderwall” to her.
I said "Maybe..."
source: @Dadsaysjokes
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